How does everyone do it? How do they manage this crazy whirlwind. I feel like every day I am just barely keeping my head above water and swimming in circles in a small baby pool {Not even sure that is possible}. After managing the remodel of my ENTIRE house in a year (Nuts, Don’t try it unless you seriously hate yourself… it sucks, promise). So here I am almost to the finish line just working on the tile in the kitchen then we should be done. Your thinking then why are you so overwhelmed by this. Because I am in a totally different place the place of “Why does it feel like I am still nowhere near completion even though we are almost done”. Is it just because I have been in this place for so long or is it something more.

On top of all of this I have been dealing with so much behind the scenes. SO much that only the closest people in the world to me know about. Of course, I know it pangs you to know I will not be sharing that detail. But, what I will share is when you really want something. You have this dream and then you constantly have doors slammed in your face NO, No.. Noooo… seriously I hear the word again I might snap. You really then just want to curl up in a ball and take a really long nap and hope you wake up and it is over. Instead you wake up to the cold harsh reality…What do you do..

I saw the picture above and I decided to get off my poopy, party, pity me train and focus on something else. I decided to focus on my faith, health, and fitness.{Go figure crisis melt down we always run for two things}:

“But seriously If this Granny can do it what am I waiting for!” (nicest way possible here)

 1: running (therapy)

Or

2: comfort foods (white chocolate cookies and cream, you hear me ladies)

 For a while I chose food then realized then not only was I stressed out but also getting CHUNKY. So I shed the weight and took on this new 12 week program (working hard to try and keep myself motivated here). I felt like if there is ONE thing in this world I have complete control over is my body. So I am ready to push it to its limits. I am focusing on all natural and healthy weight training. I need this for me again to feel like me. I also need to take care of myself so I can be here for the 1 little person in this world that I would die for in a seconds time. My daughter is my entire heart wrapped up in a perfect little package that grabs my cheeks and says “Ove you Mommy” and my world just stops. She was not my plan but God’s plan and he knew so much more then I could ever know. I will forever be so grateful for her and how she has changed my life for the better. I hope she reads this one day and knows just how much she saved me. I am amazed especially now that she is aging. I am finding myself caring less and less about some things I once was so passionate about. I just don’t care anymore as long as I can give her a good life, a happy life. I just want to be strong and healthy for her to be able to be a good example. But also so I won’t miss a day or a moment that God so graciously will allow me. In the last few months of facing trials, discovering things (the bad I wish weren’t there in some people), and hitting walls (not literally here; a fake mind wall) I have started to find a new little piece of myself I never thought was there. I got lost again only to find myself by piecing together a brand new puzzle.

 So I challenge you who are reading this today focus on Today and cherish it and those around you, before you regret it tomorrow. Don’t want for what you don’t have but for the beautiful gifts you have standing right in front of you.

 You will never regret doing it, but you will always regret Not doing it!!  

Excited about what I get to look forward to with my O.

 God

Work-out

Love Dare

 As most of you know I am a sinner. I do it daily and never once have I proclaimed to be perfect (I am not by many means). I strive daily now to put God first and to surround my life with his glory and that is the best I can do. With time I am sure my faith will grow and I will be even better at it but for now I am just going to keep moving forward and try. For years I lived a much more crazy life and made a lot of mistakes {not all bad though because I learned a lot of great life lessons and have no regrets}. One big thing comes to mind – God decided to bless me with a child. This is the only way we thought of it considering me and my hubby had only been engaged for 3 months. We were nowhere near at a place in our life for children and I was on the ~Not so Effective Birth Control~ Obviously and we used other protection (probably TMI). But I am trying to make the point we never planned our blessing but God knew and he gave us her. Because that sweet baby he blessed me with has become the entirety of my life, my soul walking before me. She makes me want to be a better person, she makes me want to work harder, be stronger, and just feels my entire chest with a huge love that I can’t even explain because there are no words when I look in her eyes and it is quiet and she just smiles at me. {HUGE run on sentence forgive me} Don’t get me wrong though it has taken a long time to get to this place. It was not the moment she was born that poof I was in love. I am one of THOSE mothers. The dreaded selfish in the beginning, I was not ready for this. I am tired, and I want my life back, blah blah blah, me, me, me. Overtime and prayer my heart changed, I grew up. I did not want to be this awful selfish person that could not love. I worked on this very hard and with time I grew to cherish her and realize I would have been missing out on my purpose for existence in her. I know a lot of mommy’s out there need to hear that to, because so many say the moment I saw them at birth my whole life changed. Which for some that is great you are blessed. Me on the other hand had a very long and hard bout with selfishness and post-partum depression {I am not touching that right now though with a ten foot pole because we could be here all day}. But, God is changing me daily and it started with him giving me a blessing that so many can’t or have lost. I am going to cherish it and share with you so I can keep myself in check and make sure to keep God as my center and raise my daughter in his light. I want her to know so when we all die she is standing in his glory with a white robe and her precious smile and doesn’t ever have to be afraid. The best gift I could ever give her back for what she has given me, my faith back.

“Woah“ Work Out- ( is like how do you top that previous topic)… But, I put them in this order for a reason. I have decided to start back on a huge work out plan to get my body and mind back in shape. I am going to strive everyday to do a spiritual exercise by my devotional and a physical work out for my body throughout the week. I want to cherish the life God has given me. To do this fullest I need to be healthy, happy, and strong. So I am excited and this is going to burn baby burn.

Love Dare- If you have not watched the movie “Fireproof” go rent it today if you are married. God says he gives us a spouse to make us whole again, woman is the rib from mans chest. There is a reason that most people love being in a relationship and don’t enjoy being alone forever. God blessed me with such an amazing man to spend the rest of my life with. He is not perfect by any means but I am learning to love his imperfections as much as his perfections to get to the most fulfilling love God can give us here on earth, behind his glorious love of course. I always thought I loved my husband until I read about the challenge of the love dare and read more books on god’s love in a relationship. I was blown away and decided to get better at something you must practice. So I am putting  the love dare to practice and going to push hard these next 40 days to let go and start loving my spouse the way God built me to love him. Marriage is a gift- it is not easy and it will not always be fun, but it is the best gift God has given me personally to get we where I am today and my blessed child through marriage. I want my baby girl to also know this love exists for her and she will also find a man and a love that is worth the hardships of marriage. God gives this blessing and I want it to always be my blessing so I know anything worth having is worth fighting for and working at. I have attached a link and a little description below if you are interested in this challenge as well.    

http://thelovedarebook.com/index.html

In the movie FIREPROOF, a couple dares to rescue their choking marriage from the flames of divorce and temptation using The Love Dare book as a guide. Now you can take the experience of the film one step further with your own copy of The Love Dare book. This daily devotional steers you through the fiery challenge of developing a strong, committed marriage in a world that threatens to burn it to the ground.

The Love Dare personally leads you through daily devotionals, records your thoughts and experiences, and ends each day daring you to perform a simple act of love for your spouse. This 40-Day journey equips you to melt hardened, separated hearts into an enduring love that can withstand the flames of fear, pride and temptation. The Love Dare book will help you reinforce and enrich your marriage, earn back a love you thought was lost, and hear more about the One who not only designed unconditional, sacrificial love—He illustrated it.

I will make mistakes, grammatical errors, misspell things some times, and not form complete sentences. This was your notification and you are now apprised. {HaHa} I am still so excited about my blog and I know I don’t get the time I wish for to write on it. But, I am out living out my crazy life so I can pop in here every now and again and give you all a peek inside. It is also a great outlet for me so I can just throw it all out there then let it go. So for me not to feel like a big wound up ball all the time or a monkey stuck in a small cage.

 Now that we have all that behind us. Let’s get focused on the upcoming fabulousness- The End of December and January..December for the celebration of Jesus’s Birthday and a time to show love one’s how much you care. January for having a fabulous New Year celebration. But, also a time for flat boring hair due to the season. But, No Fear, I put together some of my favorite finds from Pinterest and a Few I created myself. Get Ready I am going to go quick….HeHe 

 *Headband Braid*

*The Knotted Pony*

*The Modern French*

*Tumble the Side Mess*

So I made it the whole week, accomplished some small goals and stayed in my happy place 90% of the time. I have found in the last few days looking back at my journal I have a common theme. I Love being in Love! One might think this sounds crazy, but I believe (Just Maybe) that it’s because I am truly happy now. I try and always be happy, but some times I let the gloom in (Not often though). Stress on the other hand, well that bad boy is needing some work he creeps in all to often. This week was wonderful for the fact I got to do some of my all time favorite things.. Party Throwing (pics to come) at my work. I was able to throw a fabulous Wedding Shower for a friend and then a Birthday bash for a Halloween baby. It was a interesting week as well due to the time of year, Benefits time!!.. We had to have the talks, myself and hubby, about some topics benefits options bring about. I am so thankful that he takes the time to open up and tell me how he feels when I don’t understand.

Marriage I am learning, slowly but surely, is very much a give take. I believe some compromise, but not much (or both always feel like they never get what they really wanted they just settle to avoid the issue). I want some compromise on a few things, but mainly I want yes or no and passionately why..It is never easy to tell a spouse something they would not like to hear, but trust me better today then 10 years from now when your bitter and resentful. I like to just throw it out there, people are stronger than you think, most don’t just crumble into pieces and dissipate at a rejection. In my young marriage I feel so great about this week, because we overcame a big wall and came out so much stronger. I just felt the need to throw that out there this week and share. So if anyone else is in a young marriage and are in hurdles just say what you need to say. People always do better with purity from the heart and honesty from the mind.

Thanks for reading Loves!!

I love everyone and have a very difficult time not saying no. My plate Run-ith over is a understatement. I bet your thinking why are you complaining. Well, I am not complaining. I am filling in the background as to why I am cutting my plate in half and prioritizing. I stopped Grad school is the first HUGE shocker. I realized I have made it thus far not needing it and if the company really desires me to have it, then they can send me back at that time. I want to be home with my family. My family comes FIRST! My Family now is O and Hubby. I still have all of my other family too and love them very much. (I just need to emphasize here so you will know when i refer to family it is, Hubby and O.) Life is to short and I have so many things I want to accomplish in it.

So the next few months I am going to be analyzing life and making a list of my needs and wants 2011-2012. I am going to live by them and check them off one by one and make amazing memories along the way. I am going to do much better at keeping my journal going (Blog) and my picture journal. FYI: My picture Journal is my way of capturing all the amazing moments in my life no matter how big or small. The ones that when I am old and feeble, losing my memory, I can come back to. I can open tons of scrapbooks and relive the moments over and over. I love it now when I pick up a photo and the memories rush in. I can remember the way it felt, the way the air smelled, and the tinkles that flow through me as I experience every second all over again.

This little adventure I am going to call – My little Grass Roots Project!

Original I know..  :)

Get ready it is about to get real…

 So as if my life cannot get more hectic let’s throw some “Home Remodeling” into the Mix. I have decided I am determined to create a sure proof way for one to lose their mind. I feel pretty good about it right now but that could just be my delusional side talking. Back to the topic at hand though- the Re-Mod..Bom Bom BOm and bad villain Batman music playing in the back ground. {J/K}. The Bathroom will be my next undertaking and I have already re-arranged the Living Room and brought in the Fabulous Couches (AKA Sister Marlen You are AMAZING). The Bathroom we decided needs the face-lift first because the “Genius” in our house before us decided wood flooring in a bathroom is brilliant. Last time I checked wood soaks up moisture, rots, and well a five year old could tell you that would cause mold (AKA The Dreaded Mildred). So obviously you could see my concern with the fact my master bath (that I use daily) has wood flooring needs to be corrected ASAP to avoid me having a OCD Clean Freak Fit. Of course, In this process why would I want to just fix it when I can make it phenomenal instead. So let it begin and we will see just how much Tight I can Squeeze out of a Penny.

Oh Yes Yes Yes..I started school officially yesterday and it was great. Looking forward to it I just hope I don’t have any slackers in my group cases or I might just have to go Janice Dickenson on them cause we all know she is Beyond NUTS. I am feeling good about it though not thinking it should be as scary as I assumed it would be. Anyways, I got the backpack, supplies, and a great study mix on my IPod so pretty sure this program can bring it. Just kidding I don’t think I need anything bringing anything at this point I just need to keep swimming and make it out alive. “Good day readers” and thank you for your time!!

Hello World!!

So I am super emotional today I have no idea why but it happens to the best of us I guess. So what I have found to work for me is to Blog on about it. So here it goes I am just going to throw it out here because I have a yearning desire that I just can’t shake. I want to adopt a international child in the next 5 years. I know this probably sounds crazy to most people, but I can’t help it, and I think about it all the time. It is like this big fat thing I want to tell the world but I feel like I can’t because people have a lot of opinions and may not agree with me. But, I can’t put it out of my mind for months I have been thinking about it and just thinking how there are so many children in the world who have no one and it is breaks my heart. I read all the time about children starving to death and passing away just because they don’t have water. I know you can adopt locally but even the poorest children in America have it better than children parentless in Peru, Brazil, Ethiopia, and Bolivia. I know I can’t cure world hunger but If I can just make a difference in one life I will feel like I helped somehow. Gheez, I am so super sappy today but I had to get it out. Thanks for reading my ranting.

 Sincerely,

Me

You all know how obsessed I am with home improving, decorating, staging, and art anything. I probably waste a good third of my life daydreaming of pretty StuFf. So I decided today I wanted to just blog about ways I have worked with my space. We all know at some point we all started with a room, well some us probably even shared and still have not even begun to start their own space. But, for this exercise lets imagine we started with a room and let it grow into a home with time. I love spaces because with time people take blank plain white walls and dress them with their inner selves. When you go to someone’s home you are not visiting emptiness you are getting a look at who they are and what defines them from the inside out. It’s like you get a sneak peek into their soul for a second their deepest inside character is showing. As humans I feel we have a inner desire to express what is within us even the boring number types like myself. I mean really look at it, even down to the lowest level a prison cell is decorated in some way by the inmate. As people our surroundings help define us. So I love to be inspired and find new ways to express my inner self, because lordy we all know my inner self is LOUD! {HeHe} Now that my ranting is over I will begin. The first is the inspiration of making a small room my functioning space with limited funds. I took Nightstands and used them as support for a sheet board (purchased at Lowes $22) to form a functioning desk and room office space. The decorations are an array of items from different hodge podge stores on my travels and as simple as Tuesday Morning’s (This Store Amazing for Bargain Décor). I like to use Inspiration pictures and then make them my own. I use wall length curtains behind the bed to give the illusion the room and window are much larger.

The picture on the Right is my Design and the one on the left is one I found on HGTV.com. These are old designs from when I was at my condo in 2007 but give you again my start. Let’s see how this will progress as we move all the way along to defining my dream space. I threw some of my favorites in too so you can get a idea of who I have grown to be and how my space has changed to reflect just this. *EnJoY*

Make your own coasters- 4×4 tiles ($.16 Home Depot); 4×4 scrapbook paper; adhere to tile with Mod Podge and let dry; Spray a coat of clear spray paint and let dry; attach felt pads to the bottom Repinned to How-To and DIY 7 days ago from fun DIY by Amanda Rose-http://pinterest.com/dawncorrespond/

They are comfortable, inexpensive, personalized, and best of all no more “Ridiculous bLiStErS” from the cheap plastic in between these toes. I attached the picture of the pair I made for girls night above, but I am now also working on a extra pair for myself to just wear to the pool and it will be a mix between the three pairs you will see below, I love them. (Can’t wait to show you all the craziness I come up with). Have a Wonderful Day and enjoy the Sunshine!